Living on the Hill comes with the thrill of the CU college experience, including the good, the bad and the ugly.
- Let’s just get the worst out of the way: sleeping. Sleeping on the hill can be a living nightmare for anyone who wants a solid eight hours. Waking up at 4 a.m. to young love in turmoil is not an alarm intentionally set. The romance of Romeo charming Juliet with tender passion is gone and what’s left is brash screaming matches in the street. Whether it’s a boy’s beer-induced brawl or a lover’s quarrel, there always seems to be something going on at the worst possible time, in the middle of that oh-so-sweet dream. The harsh wake-up calls never get easier.
- Make sure to watch every step. You will be dodging remnants of last night’s “wholesome” fun. Broken glass, vomit and dog shit are just a few things to keep in mind.
- How much is too much? Rent on the Hill is honestly ridiculous and can’t be combated. The monopoly of this market dwindles it down to fee-taking real-estate agencies finding a way to squeeze out your last few pennies.
- Not only does rent leave you eating Ramen for every meal (with the occasional Cosmos splurge), you’re also likely to live in a run-down house that hasn’t been touched since the 60s. Years of spilled bong water and stale beer stain the walls and floor. Filth seeps through the layers of paint that hope to cover the grime, a cheap fix. Each year, there is hope for something newer and cleaner; until that day, I recommend carpet steaming and bleach.
- Cosmos pizza is a little too close … not to mention open at the peak hour of the munchies (whether this is from drinking, smoking or the everyday anxiety that comes with being a functioning member of society). While a slice bigger than your head would normally be deemed intimidating, with the addition of enough spicy ranch, it somehow evaporates at a scary fast speed. Each bite becomes better than the last. Always a seemingly good idea at the time, the layers of cheese and grease catch up to you. In the end, though, it’s always worth it.
Contact CU Independent Grapevine Contributor Ali Corwin at alexandra.corwin@colorado.edu.
